Lost In Laguna

I always associate Laguna with something dreadful and awful. Well, to be fair Laguna, hasn’t been good to me.

Moving out, moving up and moving on.

Today marks the second month since I moved out, moved up and moved in. And as the Taylor Swift song “the 1” goes “I’m doing good I’m on some new shit” perfectly sums up my current mood.

23 Things I realized as I turn 23:

1. Negotiation is powerful and it changes your life. Your life can be in a different situation just by negotiating.
2. You have to do things on your own because no one else is gonna do that for you (unless you paid someone).
3. Not everyone is going to like you, and that is fine.
4. You do not owe anyone an explanation of your choices.
5. People will always try to manipulate, control, and impose their beliefs on you.
6. You have to make some adjustments, and at some point some compromises.
7. Your rage knows your worth.
8. We are always told to walk away from things that are toxic and no longer making us happy, but no one told us it would be this hard.
9. You can be anything but not everything.
10. Your way of things is not always the best and it certainly is not the only way.
11. There are a lot of things that are beyond your control.
12. Ask more questions, don’t try to figure things out on your own.
13. You are more than just your job. You are so much more than that.
14. Sometimes a job is just a way to pay bills.
15. Finding soulmates and romance is not necessary.
16. Recharge naps are important.
17. Always ask for permission before ranting or venting out to your friend. You will never know how much they are already taking in.
18. You should have learned how to cook because cooking is a life skill, not a talent.
19. You should have saved money and bought a fridge.
20. You should have traveled more.
21. Read whenever you can.
22. There will be days where the only that makes you feel happy you are alive is a South Korean boy-group and that’s okay.
23. I still have a lot to realize and therefore a lot to learn.

Why I want to leave.

I have been fighting the strong urge to pull off a Margo Roth Spiegelman.

I always say this to my mom… I really want to go AWOL (absence without leave). I even tell it to my office mates, but they just brush it off with a laugh and some office inside jokes. They must think that I am joking. I did not bother to correct them because deep down I know my words hold a certain weight to it. And I am serious (or I could be). For the last for months I have been at the edge of doing it twice.

Why I ‘Ditched’ Facebook

First, a disclaimer. “Ditch Facebook forever” isn’t exactly accurate. As a Digital Marketing Strategist, I cannot simply ignore the social network which my work requires for me to stay in from 9-7.

Today’s Diary: June 8, Mon

I have never felt so disengaged with everyone as much as I do right now. Disengaged with work and disengaged with officemates. I just want to wallow alone in my room with lights off with nothing but the faint glow of the streetlamp across my room. I just want to lie, down sleep, not feel a thing and wake up just fine (if I plan on waking up).

Quaran-things: The Productivity Paradox

I don’t know about you but I bet you had those days wherein you are just scrolling on Instagram and all of a sudden you are bombarded with posts encouraging you with tips on how to be productive like: Read a book. Come out with a new talent. Work out more. At the same time some posts say that “It’s okay not to anything. Don’t beat yourself up and You are not your productivity.” So… which one is it?

First Death: Lost of Passion

The beginning of BTS’ Black Swan Art Film shows a quote by Martha Graham, “A dancer dies twice — once when they stop dancing, and this first death is the more painful.” The song accompanied by beautiful visuals makes us realize that the said quote isn’t only applicable to dancing but generally on whatever your passion may be.

Life Update

This post is originally posted on my old blog.

A million heartbeats, a million breathes, couple of mistakes, tons of wrong decisions, tons of regrets, lot’s of lost chances, piles of what ifs, many haircuts and lot’s of gained weight later I am back here, to you.

New Beginnings.

It will please some of you to know that I almost titled this first post “A Start of Something New” as if I’m gonna sing it on-stage during New Year’s Eve like Troy and Gabriella. But I did not, yet here we are. Welcome! Hello there, I am Nicole. Nice to meet you.